Month: <span>August 2021</span>

Nope. Even writing that title seems weird. I’m not ‘Dad’.

Not yet.

But soon and I guess I’m already starting to feel paternal, I guess this is common for most parents to be with a baby arriving in 2 months, I guess we all go through these same thoughts.

Hopes that the baby will be healthy, that we will be able to keep it safe and loved, and give it all the support and nurturing it needs to be comfortable with whoever they grow up to be.

Fears that something I do will have a negative impact somewhere along the line, and some understanding that that is going to happen to some degree.

As we approach the time when the baby is likely to start thinking about making an appearance, so we are finalising all the little things we need to do and consider. We’ve made most of the decisions we need to make, bought the things we will need (not as many as social media makes out by the way, don’t fall for it!), and the final pieces of prepping are falling into place.

We’ve completed a hypnobirthing course – highly recommended, it was informative, realistic, and definitely has us both thinking calmly about the birthing experience (thanks Katy!) – and have just started antenatal classes which are, thankfully, backing up a lot of what Katy talked us through. We feel as prepared as we can be.

I know life will change.

I know I will cry when I meet our child for the first time.

I know I will change.

And the single word that springs to mind when anyone asks how I’m feeling about becoming a Dad is excited.

I’m not scared or anxious, and whilst there are always the ‘what ifs’ we know we now have enough knowledge to make informed decisions as and when needed, decisions that will hopefully make the birthing process calm and safe for everyone involved.

I’ve learned a LOT these past few months, and will learn more. Not just about birth, or the early days of parenting, but about myself. I’m realising what kind of Dad I will be, as well as the Dad I want to be. I’m understanding where I may fall short and where I need to be mindful of my own actions, as much as where I feel comfortable and secure in what type of parents we want to be. I will make mistakes. I will learn.

As simple as it sounds, as I already know that the world we are bringing this baby into is so full of negative messages, that I will strive to instil a sense of positivity and wonder in our child and, if nothing else, I know I will do every single thing I can to make sure they feel loved, supported and safe.

I/we are also keen to remember who we are during all of this, keen to retain our own sense of identity. I will continue to find time to meditate, to get out on my bike, to go to the gym, to see friends, just as I will support Becca going for a spot of wild swimming, and getting back out on her bike, back to her gym. We work well as a team already.

So I won’t just be ‘Dad’, I will be the ‘me’ I have been learning to be all these years, I just have a little more learning to do, and that will come from our child.

And I can’t wait.

Dad Life

I’m on the mend but last week saw me struggle with some food poisoning/a tummy bug that left me in bed from Friday evening through to this morning. A few slices of toast, some isotonic drinks, were all I could stomach. I slept a lot too, as I am prone to do when ill, but had quite a bit of time just lying in bed contemplating life.

I was too tired for any prolonged or deep analysis but topics included:

  • Of my own sensibilities and thoughts on how to behave, how much of it was instilled in me by my parents, and how much have I learned/adopted for myself? And how much of our personal values will our child learn and take forward? I have a sense of growing up ‘knowing’ how to behave when in adult company (not quite sit quietly, but certainly wasn’t running about wild), but how much of that was natural to me and how much was I taught it by my parents?
  • The world is on fire, literally, and whilst we do our bit and will continue to do so – we don’t eat meat, we reuse, we recycle, we try and be mindful of purchases/deliveries – should I be doing more?
  • I really really miss being out on my bike. I don’t miss the gym as much, I don’t miss running, of all the exercise options I have, cycling is the one I really miss.
  • When did I stop watching movies? So many great movies in the last few years and I’ve seen none of them. Need to make time for that, somehow.
  • I often wonder if all my acquaintances and friends are just better at keeping in touch with other than I am, is it because I don’t reach out that I can feel cut off from them? I always get the sense that they are in touch with each other way more than they are with me. I can’t help but feel it’s my own doing and that I don’t work hard enough to maintain that, but it’s a two way street, right?
  • This cannot happen to me any time after October, not for a good six months or so, not once the baby is here!
  • I am lucky to be able to be ill and be cared for and not have to worry about pretty much anything other than taking care of myself and feeling better.
  • I wonder how much weight I’ve lost? (answer: 2kg).
  • I’ve not written for my blog for ages, it seems like I just don’t have the inclination any more. I am writing in my journal every day, even if it’s only a few lines, so I’m not worried about it, just curious to see how long this feeling will last.

Life

Finally, a Film That Understands Social Media /// We are all conspiracy theorists /// Why You Shouldn’t Use Google Maps On Your iPhone After Update /// What Makes a Cult a Cult? /// This Star Wars-Inspired E-Skin Lets Robots ‘Feel’ Objects /// The Greatest Showman | “This Is Me” with Keala Settle /// It Was All a Dream /// 10 Hip Stretches You Need In Your Life If You Sit A Lot /// The lie of “expired” food and the disastrous truth of America’s food waste problem /// The Winners Of The 2021 Audubon Photography Awards Are Breathtaking /// Giant pandas are no longer endangered, thanks to conservation efforts, China says /// Robot paramedic carries out CPR in ambulance in UK first /// The world’s best cities for mental wellbeing, according to data crunchers /// A Beginner’s Guide to Foam Rolling for Tight, Sore Muscles /// They Swore by the Diet I Created /// Earth Restored — Toby Ord /// Jason Sudeikis Is Having One Hell of a Year /// Instagram Has Become SkyMall /// Half a Life in 2 Minutes /// Shorter working week trial in Iceland hailed as an ‘overwhelming success’ /// Mystery of the wheelie suitcase: how gender stereotypes held back the history of invention /// Quarantined to Room 903 /// The artist touring the UK in an ice-cream van, to talk about grief /// Dancing With Systems /// The Best Science Fiction of 2021: The Arthur C Clarke Award Shortlist /// Podswap | Keep AirPods Alive and out of the Landfill /// OPEN LETTER TO THE GOOD GUYS /// World’s Largest Seagrass Project Proves “You Can Actually Restore the Oceans” /// When Will It Get Too Hot for the Body to Survive? /// How The Olympic Medal Table Explains The World /// Penniless: why a Victoria man has gone two decades without money

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