A myriad of disjoined thoughts, flittering about, lighting on reason and logic for the briefest of moments. Related illusions, bare facts, optimism, despair, hope, laughter. Life is odd at the moment, contradicting circumstances are beginning to reflect on each other, the negative affecting the positive. All the time my thoughts refuse to stay hidden, and leap into the forefront of my mind. Not a bad thing, but a distraction nevertheless.
The focus shifts again, maybe if… what if… searching for answers, knowing that none will present themselves. Focus shift – the future, gleaming, bright, shiny, new. Obtainable? Easy way out, difficult choices.
Salvation as distractions return, day-dream, focus shift. Magpie outside commands the attention – freedom, no choices only instinct. Balance is sought, control demanded and gained occasionally. but control of what? and how much of that control is perceived?
Glimpses of answers, glittering in enlightenment, or just reality reduced to confetti? Is this life? This random, uncontrolled, contradicting, disjoined and ultimately fragmented areas of thought and consciousness? Racing through emotions without hesitation, no control, and onwards to serenity and quiet disillusionment. Smiling, loving, needing.
Is there more to life than this? If so, what?
Learn the uncontrollable.