bookmark_borderThings I read

The Largest Autocracy on Earth /// Hannah Gadsby Full Graduation Address – 14 August 2021 | University of Tasmania /// Would You Compost Your Body to Create Life after Death? /// Why Gen Z is plugging in wired headphones and tuning out AirPods /// 9 Ways to ‘Rewild Your Attention’ /// Mindbending Lego Sculpture /// How finger counting gives away your nationality /// Alisa LiskaFlower (@liskaflower) • Instagram photos and videos /// Dave Grohl Rocks Out, Playing Drums Along to the Original Recording of “Smells Like Teen Spirit” /// How the Maestro Got His Hands Back /// There is no spiking epidemic /// Other People Don’t Think You’re a Mess /// Visualizing Auto-Tuned Vocals (Freddie vs. Bublé) /// How to be a man /// The story of my tattoo: ‘It sounds ridiculous, but it holds me to account’ /// Caroline O’Donoghue: How I imagine an annual performance review with the dog would go /// This Glasgow nightclub is turning your dance moves into renewable energy /// Singapore’s tech-utopia dream is turning into a surveillance state nightmare /// On the Internet, We’re Always Famous /// Ra Paulette’s Hand-Carved Caves /// Every Battery Is a Treasure Box /// What It Takes to Climb the World’s Most Forbidding Cliffs /// How to talk about sexual desires /// Keanu Reeves Knows the Secrets of the Universe /// I Made the World’s Blandest Facebook Profile, Just to See What Happens /// Past, Present, and Future: Use Time Perspectives to Live Better /// Why Giannis Antetokounmpo Chose the Path of Most Resistance /// How to Quiet Your Mind Chatter /// Create your account to start understanding your bias /// I write about news for a living. This is why you need to turn off news notifications

bookmark_borderRescheduled

I’m still not sure how I feel about going and standing in a busy venue, next to hundreds of other people, especially given the current (re-?)rise of COVID instances but given how many gigs I had booked that got rescheduled thanks to the pandemic, it’s something I need to figure out.

I have some time to get my head around it mind you, with gigs from 2020 being rescheduled to 2022 (and one in 2023) and whilst I’ve already missed one (sorry Elbow!) there are a couple on the list below that we will NOT be missing!!

  • Skunk Anansie – 26th April 2022
  • Pet Shop Boys – 29th May 2022
  • Crowded House – 10th June 2022
  • Brass Against – 23rd June 2022
  • Hella Mega Tour – 29th June 2022
  • Elton John – 17th June 2023

Of course we also now have the wonderful additional complication of Jack to consider too – I can see me dragging someone else along to Skunk Anansie – but by the end of May hopefully the wee man will be able to be babysat for an evening whilst Mum & Dad go out and have some fun.

I’ve missed live music, more than I think I even realise, and I am excited to get back to the venues as long as I can shake this unsettling anxiousness that remains. Part of me thinks I’m worrying too much, part of me thinks I should just cancel the lot of them and sell the tickets because I just don’t trust ‘people’ enough to feel safe. That said, many people I trust are back out at gigs, although the pervasive notion seems to be “double jabbed is good enough and sure I might get COVID but I won’t die so what’s the harm?” which doesn’t really set my mind at ease.

Equally I have a family to think about and, as a contractor, if I don’t work I don’t get paid and whilst we have a small buffer in place I find I’m more cautious these days about such things; sidebar to being out on my bike and almost having a very bad incident which was entirely down to my own folly, to which end I am now much more careful on descents and corners lest I end up skidding into another turning on the wrong side of the road and thanking a deity that there aren’t any cars there.

I know these fears and worries will fade, just as I know that as time goes by I find myself yearning to get back out into gig land. I know too that by the time these gigs roll around I’ll feel a lot more comfortable within myself about being out and about amongst the masses, as we unite at the alter of live music. Oh Happy Day!

In fact I know I’ve turned a corner in my thinking because I’m already keeping an eye out for other gigs, although I’m going to need to be pretty picky given the additional logistics to consider. And even if I don’t pick up any other tickets that still leaves Skunk Anansie as a ‘first gig’ back which might just be perfect; it’ll be rammed, hot, busy, and LOUD. Just the thing to finally shake off my COVID fears and get me back out into the world.

bookmark_borderThings I read

“Rewilding Your Attention” /// How Lizzie Deignan became Queen of Hell /// The Curse of Knowledge: A Difficulty in Understanding Less-Informed Perspectives /// The Gender Researcher’s Guide to an Equal Marriage /// Why philosopher Henri Bergson rejected the word “time” /// How Michelangelo’s David turned Renaissance Italy on its head /// I’m sad at work and don’t know what to do with my life /// Africa’s iconic architecture in 12 buildings /// The Art of Not Taking Things Personally /// COP26: what’s the point of this year’s UN climate summit in Glasgow? /// The K-Pop Fans Who Have Become Anti-Authoritarian Activists in Myanmar /// ‘If you focus on control, you have lost the battle’: how to win back your kids /// Why The Hell Haven’t You Deleted Facebook Yet? /// The Largely Untold Story Of How One Guy In California Keeps The World’s Computers On The Right… /// Writing “Eleanor Rigby” /// Japanese Philosophies That’ll Help You Spend Money Consciously

bookmark_borderWelcoming Jack

Hello Jack, my son,

You arrived early, but safely, and the last few weeks we’ve been getting to know you, figuring out your needs and wants, and mostly just gazing at you in utter adoration.

You seem to be settling into life well, and I think your Mum and I are doing a pretty good job of keeping you happy, safe, warm, clean, and fed. The latter is all down to your Mum right now but that means I get to hang out with you, hold you in my arms and, so far, you don’t seem to be bored of my chat although admittedly it’s mostly been silly noises.

You’ve met the family already, Granny Morna, Grandpa Liam and Uncle Robbie were all thrilled to say hello, your Auntie Jen (keeping the family tradition going) had a special t-shirt to wear the first time you met, your cousin Lucy has had a squish and, well, your cousin Daisy is only 9 months old herself so it’s safe to say that neither of you were that aware of each other but that’ll change!

And of course Granny McLean was delighted to meet her first grandson, she’ll definitely spoil you rotten (although I think Granny Morna is up for the challenge). I am a little sad that you won’t get to meet Grandpa McLean, but trust me when I say he would’ve adored you every bit as much as I do.

I’ll roll out some cliches now because they are all true (or they wouldn’t be cliches); since the minute the nurse handed me to you, all swaddled up, I couldn’t take my eyes off you. I’ll happily confess that I cried, tears of joy streaming down my face as I looked at you, and I knew instantly that I’d do anything for you. Anything.

Since you arrived it’s been a whirlwind of feeding, napping, and changing. Ohh and noises and wriggling and smooshes. Lots of those. Cannot get enough of you, holding you, gazing at you… I may have said that already.

You are putting on weight well, feeding well (and often) and so far seem to be very chilled out, laidback little person. It’s fascinating to watch you already becoming a small boy, losing that newborn baby face, and those big eyes (just like your Mum) starting to take in the world around you. You’ve made friends with the dogs too, although right now they aren’t interested at all as you can’t play with them or give them food.

I’m your Dad.

What a sentence that is, so short but so utterly life changing in the most wonderful of ways.

I apologise now for all the bad jokes, but everything else is yours to discover. Your Mum and I will be there every step of the way as you grow, and we can’t wait to meet the adult you, regardless of what choices you make. We will be there for you, and just want you to be safe and sensible, although neither of us are sure how we will help you achieve any level of “being sensible” as, as you’ll find out soon enough, we are both a bit daft.

But we love you. More than I realised was possible.

My gorgeous boy,

Your Dad x

P.S. We have decided not to share many photos of you on social media. Only abstracts for the main part, as we want that to be your decision when you grow up.

bookmark_borderThings I read

Yves & variation /// Learning from the Vessel: How cities can be designed to prevent suicide /// How Life Became an Endless, Terrible Competition /// Culture as counterculture by Adam Kirsch /// How to take an FTP test on Zwift to kickstart your winter training /// 1000 Dreams /// Michael K. Williams was more than just Omar from The Wire. He elevated Black identity onscreen. /// Oh My Fucking God, Get the Fucking Vaccine Already, You Fucking Fucks /// Your beliefs are much harder to justify than you think /// ‘There is so much bad behaviour everywhere’: how to raise a good child in a terrible world /// No Laughing Matter? What the Romans Found Funny /// ‘A Loveable Anarchist’: The Oral History of Mr Blobby /// Baker’s Dozen /// How Facebook Undermines Privacy Protections for Its 2 Billion WhatsApp Users /// How Friendships Change in Adulthood /// It’s Not in Your Head: The World Really Is Getting Worse /// Every Sport a Bowling Ball /// Help! I Couldn’t Stop Writing Fake Dear Prudence Letters That Got Published /// If only the UK could panic-buy prime ministers who know what they’re doing /// Tenet Really Explained, For Real This Time /// Worn Out — Real Life /// How to be a man /// The Spine Collector /// Confessions of a Michelin Inspector

bookmark_borderNOT more to life than this

At present, I really only have three topics of conversation.

1. The dogs.
2. The baby.
3. Cycling.

And no, they aren’t in a specific order.

Of course, there is more to life than those three things (apparently?) – those on my Instagram can attest that I’m still treating myself well with delicious foodstuffs if nothing else – and yes I read the news, and yes I watch football and F1, and yes I read books (and yes some of those books are ones about bringing up a child).

I even watched a movie the other day! Tenet if you are interested, an interestingly baffling almost good movie.

Outside of that, with the baby due in 4 weeks, I’m trying to do the rounds of seeing my friends and making sure our home is as ready as it can be for when our child arrives. We’ve sensibly ‘retained’ our dog sitter and the dogs will stay with her for a few days so we can have that time, just me and Becca and the wee smush, to adjust to being home before team chaos return to investigate this small smelly noisy thing that will be turning their lives upside down.

We aren’t worried about the dogs and how they will react. Actually, that’s not entirely true, we do worry that Sasha will use her usual sign of affection and sit ON the baby which, I’m sure you will agree, is less than ideal. Dave we think will either be in protector mode and never leave the baby’s side or will be completely disinterested.

We’ve just finished our wonderful NCT course too and, between that and the amazing hypnobirthing classes, we feel as well prepared as we can be, with the full realisation that we will still be learning a lot as we go.

And there I go again, talking about the baby.

On the other hand, I haven’t mentioned my bikes, one of which has two new tyres and a new chain needing to be sorted, and the other is going to be out and about on Sunday for another FLAB Social Ride. I missed not being out on my bike this last week or so – I managed to hurt my back and was laid up for most of last week – so it’ll be good to be out in the fresh air.

I’m also harbouring ideas, now that the weather is turning, to get back out running with a long-standing ‘do a ParkRun’ goal possibly being realised before the year is out. All part of my secret ‘Fit for Fifty’ plan that is slowly (very slowly at times!) having a positive effect on my physical fitness and my mental health. Hopefully, that means I can take Dave out with me on a run now and then too, which will be good for him as well!

So there you have it, try as I might – I did mention I watched a movie, and I’ve been reading some books too, right? – the topics remain the same.

This makes sense, this is my life, after all, I am the one who made the decisions that brought me here. And I have no complaints, just the realisation that my life is beautifully focused and simple now, there is very little in the way of negativity that can creep in, and I spend the vast. majority of my time on things I love.

I guess my life can be seen to be simple and viewed through the lens of this blog and my other social media channels it certainly appears that way, but that is no bad thing. There are many things you don’t see, things I don’t mention, passions that I retain for myself, and my life feels all the richer for it.

I’ve blogged before about ‘minimalism’ and the like, but perhaps that’s not, or should not, best viewed through the lens of commerce and possessions, perhaps the simpler more minimal life is one where your passions and desires align and bring you riches of happiness every day. Perhaps this is what I’ve been striving for all along and the slow reduction of physical clutter (which needs to happen again soon) has maybe let me pause and breathe and relax into who I am, and what my life has become.

The fact I can boil it down to mostly three things, three things that make me happy every single day, is probably the most telling of all. This simple life.


I’d be remiss if I didn’t conclude this without mentioning the glaring omission, the one constant support these past few years, the one who encourages me, listens to me and is going to be the most amazing mother to our child. Without her, my life would be empty. I am very lucky to be part of her life and so so very grateful we found each other.