Month: <span>February 2004</span>

Blackfriars, Babbity Bowsers, Cafe Mao, Metropolitan, Corinthian (slouch bar).

Guinness, Guinness, Indonesian Tiger Prawns, champagne cocktails, Budvar.

4.30pm to 3.00am.

Top night.

Including the story about having to measure Kylie’s bum.

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………. … …. … ……….. ……….! ……. .. ………. . … ………, ……… …… .. ………….. … ….. ….. ……..

In other words, very good night, very hungover, going back to bed


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In what is fast becoming a monthly tradition (well every tradition has to start somewhere) I took myself to FOPP at lunchtime. I managed to stay within my self-allotted 30 minutes/£30 limit as well. The following purchases were made:

  • Busta Rhymes – Turn it up! The very best of.
  • The Legendary songs of Cole Porter – Various Artists (Peggy Lee, Billie Holiday, Louis Armstrong and the like).
  • R.E.M. – Dead Letter Office.
  • Sheryl Crow – C’mon C’mon.
  • Retrospective: Best of Suzanne Vega.

Hmm quite a musical day really.

Tonight it’s off to the pub to meet up with my mates. Not seen them since December so plenty of catching up to do, and no doubt plenty of Guinness as well. Probably just as well that Louise is staying at her sister’s tonight as the ‘morning after’ a night on the Guinness is… well, let’s just say ‘fragrant’.

So if anyone is out and about in Merchant City (Glasgow) tonight, let me know – we are starting in BlackFriars at 5ish.

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The last 20 tracks broadcast forth from my Harman/Kardon speakers (from iTunes Library on shuffle) were:

  • Gil Scott-Heron – Did you hear what they said
  • Billy Joel – It’s still Rock and Roll to me
  • Ike & Tina Turner – Nutbush City Limits
  • Kylie vs Moloko – Bring it back in your eyes
  • Broken Social Scene – KC Accidental
  • The Chemical Brothers – In Dust We Trust
  • Gary Moore – Jumpin’ at shadows
  • Suede – Trash
  • Morcheeba – Can’t stand it
  • Bob Dylan – Oh, sister
  • Dannii Minogue – Put the needle on it
  • The Drifters – Kissin’ in the back row of the movies
  • White Stripes – Let’s build a home
  • Madonna – Intervention
  • The Beatles – Yesterday
  • Deltron 3030 – Battlesong
  • Sly Stone – Stand!
  • Jackson 5 – Blame it on the boogie
  • Blur – Mellow song
  • Tom Petty – Free Falling

Hmmm surprisingly free of rock music really, considering about 70% of my MP3s are of that genre.

And for the record: I disagree with people limiting this meme to a playlist (e.g. limited choice) it should be your entire library – all or nothing people, all or nothing!

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He may be on his way back… yes the rumours are true.

But before we can, weepingly, embrace him back into the fold we need to convince him that we have been reading his archives religiously in his absence (er… well I’ve read a little…). 120 questions to be answered by 120 different bloggers – just need to search his archives and plonk in an answer.

Go there now – for the love of all things blog-goodyness! go now! – and take part in: The Great Troubled Diva Shall I Or Shan’t I Start Blogging Again? Potential Act Of Monumental Hubris Comprehension Test

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I mentioned a while back that I’d been invited to become a moderator on the Haloscan forum. I’m pretty comfortable with HTML, CSS, Javascript and the way the commenting system works, so I thought it would be a good chance to ‘give back’.

But I forgot that people are morons. No not everyone, and I guess, really, they aren’t morons … let me start over.

I’m not a patient kind of guy. In my line of work the only person I really need to explain things to is me or my team. Now as I hired everyone in my team (yeah yeah it’s a team of one at the moment, but it did get all the way up to 5 at one point!) I know that I can expect a certain level of knowledge and go from there.

I should also remember that back in 1997 I was the one asking silly questions in the ADV-HTML mailing list.

I also realise that there is no such thing as a stupid question, that everyone’s knowledge levels are different etc etc etc this is all stuff I think about during my working day (will x know this or do I need to explain it?)

Moderating a forum is pretty straightforward really. Trouble is I’d forgotten that people are morons. Ohh I wasn’t going to say that was I… OK SOME people are just downright lazy. The instant they get a little problem – off to the forums they go, posting merrily. Now the Haloscan FAQ could be better (and yes I’m compiling one at the moment) but the forum has a SEARCH option… how difficult is it?? Obviously too difficult for some.

But of course this is human nature, again something I study for professional purposes. Everyone is the same. If you have a problem with something what do you do? You ask someone for help. You don’t consult the documentation, you don’t check and see if someone has asked a similar question before. There are a myriad of reasons why people don’t use documentation as often as they should, the main one being that in their experience it’s badly written (incomplete, inaccurate or not context-sensitive enough).

However this lack of using a search function is a new one for me. Maybe it is the case the some people are just so new to the whole thing (a lot of people in the forum have ‘just setup their blog and can’t get x to work’), but even then it’s slightly galling that they can’t even be bothered to search the forum first to see if anyone has had a similar problem (and considering 75% of posts I reply to are “I can’t get the code to work” and are a result of people not following the TWO STEPS it takes…. no no, must stay calm…).

Suffer fools gladly.



Where did that phrase come from anyway? Ohh the bible you say?


“Who, in the history of the world, ever did suffer fools gladly? Well, Shakespeare did, obviously. Since he gave them so many roles, he must have liked having them around. Others, less great, may enjoy fools as part of the human comedy, perhaps bearing in mind that all of us are fools sometimes, some of us fools often. In fact, I live in hope of reading someday an obituary that says: “He was wise and talented, greatly accomplished, and much admired, above all for his ability to suffer fools gladly.” “

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I grew up with a dog. No, not JUST a dog…

She was part of the family, always there, she went everywhere with us for the most part. She was a bit daft, as golden retrievers are prone to be, but she didn’t have a nasty bone in her body. She loved giving people presents (including the oft recalled ‘tortoise incident’). I miss my dog. I miss taking her out for walks. Brushing her, playing in the back garden, taking her to the park. I miss Sintra.

The nearest park to us was Levengrove (Dumbarton Common was the nearest piece of ground but was surrounded by roads) and every weekend, and some week nights, we’d pile into the car and drive over. The park sits at the junction of the River Leven (which runs down from Loch Lomond) and the River Clyde.

The minute the boot opened, Sintra would leap out and head straight for the water. There was no stopping her, so we’d just let her run off and trail after her, maybe kicking a football, or throwing a frisbee (or an aerobee – remember them?). When we caught up with her she’d be waiting in the water. Now those of you who had a dog may well remember this kind of thing. The expectancy. The patience. That dog would stand in freezing cold water for as long as it took to make you throw something. Silly dog.

So you’d pick up a pebble and chuck it and Sintra would leap into life, dashing for where she thought it would land (thinking back it was a bit dangerous chucking stones near to a dog… we weren’t throwing AT her!). Then she’d do that thing dogs do when something lands in water. They’d try and .. well.. bite the splash. Obviously doggy brains can’t quite handle the fact that, despite the fact they are standing IN the water, items landing on it will not stay on TOP of it. She’d stand there, staring at the spot where the pebble had splashed, utterly bemused that it had vanished.

You could repeat this for several hours, or until your arm dropped off. Silly dog.

Louise grew up with several dogs, all retrievers too, but we only ever had one. Anymore would’ve felt… I dunno… disrespectful or something.

Anyhoo, thanks to for the memories. His pictures of Levingrove Park (and Dumbarton Castle – a volcanic plug don’t ya know) have left me with a nice ‘homely’ glow.

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I wasn’t allowed one. It wasn’t a sensible choice. I knew that. I’m not sure if I even asked or pleaded or begged in the usual “I want, I want, I want, I want…” way that kids have perfected (I’ve tried similar techniques recently as I want to get a new car… the reaction from my wife is… well it isn’t the one I wanted. I digress.)

So here I am. A thirty-something with disposable income. So imagine my elation this morning when I read in the paper that: “Classic Chopper makes a comeback”

At last. I can own the bike that was cooler than cool. Although there are a couple of potential disappointments that I’ve already spotted. Firstly the seat is now ‘split’ so no more banana seat which I’m presuming will mean that you can’t set the seat waaay back and have the handlebars set low like a bad boy Harley Davidson (Did I really think like this when I was 12?). Secondly, where are the gears? One of the coolest things was having that ‘car-like’ gear stick in the middle of the frame. Without that, well, it’s just a bike…

And yes, I know I will look utterly ridiculous riding a Chopper aged 30, with beer belly, bald spot and all. But I might not care.

I’m off to phone the wife… “But I reeealllly want one, I want, I want, I want….”

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