Finding a way

Our son is almost 14 months old (no I don’t know when you stop counting in months) and thriving. We are adapting to his needs as best we can and overall we have each day down to a pretty regular routine. Recently we’ve started to realise we both need to carve time out for ourselves as we’ve gotten a bit lost in enjoying and learning our roles as parents; we are both still a little amazed we have managed to keep this sturdy, bright, curious, cheeky boy alive for over a year now but it’s time to look ahead at 2023 and figure how we get a little more ‘me’ time for each of us.

With that in mind we decided every Sunday we will take turns to have an ‘me’ morning; a morning where we can do whatever we choose as long as it’s just for ourselves, sleep, sit in a cafe and read a book, exercise, anything that takes our fancy. We’ve not managed it every Sunday (hello toddler at nursery and the many ills that now blight this house!) but Becca has managed to go for a wild swim with her friend, and I managed to get out on my bike again for the first time since April. It felt good to be out in the fresh air plodding along; I’ll admit that I was torn between the desire to switch my brain off completely and just sit quietly somewhere for a while, or being a bit better to my body (and mind) and doing some form of exercise so I’m glad (for once) that I chose the latter.

I find it intriguing how quickly we have adapted throughout the past year, from the first terrifying few weeks with a tiny baby, through feeding changes, sleep pattern changes, a house move, the first mornings at nursery, a naming ceremony/wedding day, and somehow we’ve managed to find a new normal every time, a new routine to help Jack flourish.

I’ll be honest, there have been some dark days, raising Jack is THE single most important thing I’ve ever been part of and I take any little thing that hasn’t been quite right to heart as I want nothing but the best for him. I know I’ve been a bit hard on myself at times too, letting myself hide away behind the ‘being a Dad’ facade and putting all my own needs last but, as we slowly (re)establish a routine and I return to habits that have served me well in the past, I am starting to feel like I’m finding my way… well… not back per se, but certainly finding a new version of me, one that is not that much different from the old me, but who just happens to be a Dad as well!

And you know what, I wouldn’t change a thing. I’ve been so so lucky, Jack is a wonderfully laid back little boy, Becca is the most nurturing and caring mother and wife, and I just feel so lucky and blessed to be part of their lives. As ever I’ll still be looking for ways to improve things for them, and me, as regardless of what else happens life is still very much Happily Imperfect after all.

Comments

  1. What a lovely post. Pretty well perfect.

    And it’s months up to 2 years, more or less. Then it’s years plus quarters for a bit. Once they know their own age, they go to years and months, until they’re about 6.

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