I have run out of cardboard boxes.
Unfortunately that doesn’t mean that everything is packed, nor does it mean I have to stop moving things around and contemplating how best to pack the big ornamental candle, several bottles of various types of booze and three tea towels.
But it does mean that the house is starting to look like it’s being moved out of.
Which is just as well as on the 5th of October I get the keys to my new flat, and by the 11th of October everything that is left will be loaded into a van (not by me, I hasten to add) and taken to said new flat. There, some of it will form my new ‘home’ and some of it will be stacked in the spare room until such times as Louise gets herself somewhere to live (she has somewhere, but it’s not very big and is only temporary).
Then the usual round of final payments, settling of debts, and a sudden and brief rise in the balance of my bank account which will, all to prematurely, ejaculate itself to various other recipients. A financial bukkake if you will (Mother, do NOT Google that word, and if you do I think it was Keith that told me it, or Stuart.. ).
The 15th of October is the agreed date, but of course it’ll be a few days after that, once my solicitor has finished her faffing around, that I’ll get the remnants of profit from the sale of the house. That goes to some shared debts and a little bit is left over for Louise and I.
And then, that’s it. Separated. And in one calendar year from then (from the 16th of October) we will be divorced. Not quite the type of thing one expects for their birthday but needs must.
I’ll leave you with this, it’s been in my head all day and I thought it only fair that I’d share the joy. Yes it is a YouTube link, no, it’s not Rick Astley (I’ve done that to too many people already, I would like to retain the few friends I have).