There are somethings that should be sacred, untouchable. They should be locked away, never to be tainted, altered or, god forbid, ‘updated’. How many hours did I spend glued to the television (ahh so that’s why my brain is addled) watching Cartoon Time and Rolf’s Cartoon Club, absorbing non-PC cartoons into my being. Revelling in the violence and stereotypes they presented, safe in the knowledge that this belonged to me, this was not the domain of adults, this was mine. Tom and Jerry, Captain Caveman, The Fantastic Four, Scooby Doo, The Flintstones and so many more. Each one leaving an indelible imprint on my memory and my soul.
Quite a few of these cartoons were reworked by different artists over their lifetime, Tom and Jerry’s ‘Big Mama’ changing to a ‘modern’ lady. Scooby inheriting Scrappy (or whatever the deal was there), The Flintstones giving birth to Bam-Bam.
Then came Hollywood. First they ‘updated’ The Flintstones, and whilst it wasn’t a great film, it was reasonably faithful to it’s origin.
Now we have the ‘updated’ Scooby Doo. And it’s just wrong. Take a moment, think about the characters from the cartoon, think, specifically about Velma (guys, stop thinking about Daphne for a moment please!). OK, Velma. Got a mental picture, bobbed hair, thick glasses, nerdy brain girl type.. ok? Look what they did to her. I don’t remember her glasses being trendy, and I certainly don’t remember even a HINT of cleavage… what is going on? I’m outraged!!!
This is more like what I remember, but I’m not convinced they’ve got the title character quite right.
And this is the problem. They are competing with a million different memories, and in trying to appease everyone, they’re gonna fall short. Solution: Don’t mess with my childhood!!
Ohhh and one thing about all this weighs heavy on my mind. The sequel… ohhh dear god…