Let me just say that again, because I can’t quite believe it. My son, our little bundle of joy and chaos, starts school today.
He turns 5 in October and is very very ready for school.
I think. No, he is. He is most definitely ready, and ohhh so excited.
I’m not sure I am though.
I mean it was only yesterday I was holding him, swaddled tight, moments after he was born, watching this tiny little squishy thing sucking on the edge of the towel. My son.
I didn’t know I was going to have a son. We decided not to find out beforehand, and I know I’d have loved a daughter as much as I love my son. That’s easy to say of course, although the thought of loving anyone, any thing, more than I love Jack is… impossible.
I’m ok though.
I am not ok.
But I am. I will be.
I mean I thought I was ok with it all, I really did. And I am, it’s a great life moment for him, and for me and Becca. And then the other day he tried on his new school uniform for the first time.
There have been some tears. By me. He was too busy smiling and posing in the mirror to notice. He looked immediately more grown up than ever, yet still just my gorgeous, kind, silly, smart, funny, thoughtful boy.
I am feeling all the emotions today. Gratitude, pride, happiness, and a real sense of life moving forward, and what his future may hold for him.
Today we watched him walk into his primary school, back-pack confidently slung on his shoulders, this tiny boy. My entire world. The next chapter of his life has begun.
That was an hour ago.
I have stopped crying now.
Just.
What are your thoughts?