In the spirit of things

I got told off by our security guard as I entered the building this morning. We met at the door just as he was leaving and he politely asked me not to smoke there.

It’s nice that he was concerned for my health, although as I was huddled over trying to listen to my mobile at the time it was a little confusing. That and the fact I don’t smoke of course.

It’s funny, but any time I start thinking about this topic I end up considering smoking jackets and from there it’s a short hop to smouldering jackets (which belch smoke from the jacket itself), I’m sure it’s a comedy sketch from somewhere but I can’t recall where. I digress.

Having never been a smoker I really don’t see what all the fuss is about and as far as I’m concerned it’s a vile habit. Admittedly I choose to kill myself by slowly hacking off my limbs a millimetre at a time so I reckon my lifespan is about the same as that of a smoker but at least I’m not polluting those around me…

My grandparents smoked, my Grandpa more than my Gran and after several strokes left him wheelchair bound and in need of permanent care. He couldn’t talk and had very little control over his body, meaning that my abiding memory of him is an angry old man, banging on the table to try and communicate. He still had a smile and twinkle in his eye but for a young boy he was quite scary. Lord knows what my sister thought of him.

I know it’s a hard habit to break and I know it’s a bit twee (not to mention self-righteous of me) to suggest you thinking about it on this particular day, simply because someone, somewhere, decrees today as No Smoking Day but, if not today, when?

Comments

  1. Carry On Screaming, as far as I remember. She reclines on the chaise-longue and asks “Do you mind if I smoke?” “No,” he replies and white fumes start billowing out from beneath her.

  2. Every smoker should be made to work in a coronary care ward for a month. They might then believe what the future had in store for them.

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