Month: September 2005

Ohh a navel!

Reading time: < 1 min

Does blogging about your own site count as navel-gazing?

Anyhoo… you may have noticed that the entries in the miniblog are getting longer. If you haven’t noticed let me state that “the entries in the miniblog are getting longer”.It started unconsciously but as with most things the habits we form and the way we use our own sites leads us down certain paths. I think the current “type” of posts I have, with mainly longer ones here and shorter ones in the miniblog, suite ME better and I certainly feel more comfortable about posting these days.

When I did my last re-design of this site, I made the post titles deliberately big to both lend them some visual weight and to challenge me to write posts that would be worthy of such a grand (in size at least) title. In addition, the posts I wrote up before I went on holiday a few months back, gathered quite a few comments and I’m quite proud of a couple of them. I took my time to draft and edit them, thought them through, and – and this is probably the crucial bit – I didn’t post them day after day. The gap between posts allowed more people to “see” the posts and the number of comments rose in direct relation.

So I’ve been trying to post the smaller posts in the miniblog, and keep this area free for longer posts, it’s something I’ll be continuing but does leave me with a problem. The miniblog is a bit cramped at the moment (I think) and could do with a little more room, so – and I’ve hinted at this recently – I’m redesigning. Again. Wanna peek?

Rubber service

Reading time: < 1 min

I’ve just witnessed a blatant display of sexism, it’s quite shocking when you see these things up close, especially as, being a middle-aged middle-class white male, there are few “-isms” that can be used against me (for isn’t that the true definition of an -ism, an aspect of yourself that others use against you??) and no I’m not counting “you-fat-bastard-ism”.

Anyway, one of my chores today was to get a tyre fixed for the car. Looked like a simple puncture, so on my wife’s recommendation, I took it up to a place near her office which she had used previously. Small, local run (cheap!) and great service she said. Excellent, I thought.

I dropped the tyre off and said I’d be back in about an hour as I had to run some errands. “No problem” he said. An hour later I returned and the tyre was fixed and ready for me all for the princely sum of £8. Great, I thought.

However Louise had mentioned that when she had last used the garage they had put the newly fixed tyre back on the car. And they did. FOR HER! I got a “Cheers mate” and bugger all else. Should I report them for their obviously sexist customer services??

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I couldn’t manage it my own or anything, it’s just that my nails are all dirty now…

Lethal Force Knee-Jerk

Reading time: 2 mins

The news that Strathclyde Police Force has introduced Taser stun-guns has already sparked the usual round of “letters to the editor” stating various figures about how many people have died in the USA since these guns were introduced over there.

Personally, as a supporter of Amnesty International, I find myself torn on this issue.

On one hand there is evidence that these stun-guns can kill. That is a lot more than they are supposed to do, and there are calls for more rigorous testing before Tasers are rolled out across all the police forces in the country.

On the other hand these stun-guns are designed as a last-ditch option, so for a percentage of their use they will be aimed at criminals, people offering deadly harm to others. My sympathy level always drops in these cases.

On, um, a hand belonging to someone else the recent shooting of Jean Charles de Menezes proves that mistakes can be made but I would suggest that, in you consider the NON-mortality rate of the stun-gun, it would be a better option than a gun.

Of course these kinds of things are always going to spark debate (ouch), and as ever the knee-jerk reaction is the most worrying thing. We are becoming an increasingly reactionary society, already playing the blame game, pre-judging events that have yet to happen. Some people are suggesting that the police will just forget about their batons and use tasers instead and whilst this suggestion does irk, it also invokes images of Indiana Jones style scenes where they calmly ‘taser’ the onrushing ned and his chib*.

The world we live in is not ideal, I’ve mentioned before that there seems to be a lack of respect, a lack of discipline in some areas of society. We should be helping those areas by providing funds where needed, helping with education and supporting the families until they are in a position to help others. I truly believe that.

However the smallest subsection of society (of humanity?) is happy to take take take. They don’t want educated, they don’t want supported, they want what they want and they don’t care who gets in their road. For THOSE people, I say Taser them if required. Harsh? Yes. Just like life.

Beautiful

Reading time: < 1 min

A while back, Vaughan mentioned the most beautiful rainbow he’d ever seen. I commented at the time and always meant to expand on my thoughts here.

But how do you discuss something that is entirely subjective? What is beautiful to me may seem whimsical or down right soppy to you, not to mention that beauty can be found in many different forms, different emotions, different states of mind. Like a balloon swirling in the wind what you consider beautiful is influenced by your ever-changing mood but, whether you are carefree or melancholy, it’s there. Always.

Suffice to say that, in my opinion, everyday you’ll see something beautiful, if only you know how to see it.

And that’s your challenge for today, dearest reader, go see something beautiful.

I’ll start. On the way into work this morning, as the sun rose, I sat opposite a middle aged woman. She sat in the window seat, eyes closed, letting the sun wash over her face, a slight smile creasing the corners of her mouth. I watched her for a few seconds, just an average person on an average day, light up with golden light. I looked away with a smile.

Slow Motion

Reading time: < 1 min

Slow Motion: A Memoir by Dani Shapiro

I bought this book in the local charity shop, solely based on a few paragraphs and a stylish cover (not the one that Amazon have), I’ve been reading it on the way home from work on the train, and have to admit I’m surprised to have quite liked this.

The story of a young lady who has a life she doesn’t recognise, pretending to be an actress whilst having an affair with a married filthy rich lawyer in the boom times of the 80s, and how a car crash provides the literal, and metaphorical framing for her life.

It’s heartfelt and honest and whilst not many people will be able to relate to the circumstances, most will be able to empathise with the “not sure how my life got here” feelings and confusion that Dani has. It’s the story of a rebellious teenager who suddenly realises she is a young woman.

Not for everyone but certainly not particularly deep – at one point in the book some of Dani’s earliest writing for college is described as “skimming over the depths” – but it’s well written enough to keep you turning the pages.

Making Money

Reading time: 2 mins

The geezer with the numbers tells us there are only 100 days until Christmas. I knew this because I live with the original “Crimbo nutter”. She has a countdown printed off and stuck up on her wall at work. She made it up a month ago.

Anyway, 100 days until the big glittery, sparkling day when we all eat too much, drink too much and avoid the Queen’s speech. Wouldn’t it be nice to have a little extra cash around Christmas this year? A few extra quid?

Well why not join me in my revolutionary new scheme and you too could be in the money for mistletoe-time (he says, grasping for an alliteration. I do apologise, that was awful). It’s very simple, and is not related to anything even slightly triangular shaped, let alone pyramidular (is that a word?).

The idea is simple.

Dig out the change in your pocket/wallet/purse.

Count it.

Is there at least £1 there?

Good (if not, ask to a friend or colleague if you can “borrow” enough to make it up to that amount)*.

Put it in a tub marked “Xmas Saving Plan”.

Do the same tomorrow.

And the next day.

And the next day.

Continue doing this every day until it’s Christmas.

Next thing you know Auntie Ethel is smearing her warm, waxy lipstick all over your cheek, you are wearing a hideous jumper, are the proud owner of ANOTHER twenty pairs of socks but you won’t care because you’ll have £100 in your backpocket!

It MAY be an idea to change the coins into notes otherwise your backpocket may end up pulling your trousers down. Ladies, keep the coins, put them in your purse and if anyone tries to snatch it they’ll be stopped dead in the street as gravity kicks in (it’s two great schemes in one, save money AND protect your handbag!).

I’m offering this AMAZING scheme free of charge. Why? Because I’m a nice guy, that’s why.

It has absolutely NOTHING to do with the fact I’m sitting here watching progress bars on a 20 minute install, and have had 5 cups of coffee already… honest guv…

* It is not advisable to continue asking friends for £1 everyday. Unless you have a lot of friends/colleagues/family who don’t mind being taken for a ride. If you do then best of luck! Why not ask for £2!?

This post is brought to you by Humbug Productions. No responsibility for the safe-keeping of your savings is offered. If you happen to pilfer it to spend down the pub in late November DON’T COME CRYING TO ME!