bookmark_borderShaggy Blog Stories

UPDATE: The deadline has been pulled FORWARD. You have until 6pm on Tuesday 13th March (that’s tonight!)

How tardy of me.

At some point, deep in the midst of my brain-melting week, I received an email from mike. Mike had had a big idea. That, in itself, is nothing new. Mike has big ideas all the time and, largely, puts every other blogger, that has ever existed, now and before, to shame.

I really must learn to punctuate, the previous sentences contains too many commas and that can’t be good for you…

The big idea, in aid of Comic Relief, is detailed on mike’s site:

What I’m proposing is to assemble and publish – in the space of just seven days – a paperback anthology of blog writing, that can be sold to raise funds for the charity.

The book will be called Shaggy Blog Stories: a collection of amusing tales from the UK blogosphere.

Genius.

So, if you is a person wot blogs, and you have writed a funny post, no matter how long ago, then let mike know.

All the details are on his site, and uptake looks good so far, but it could be better!!

Me? I don’t do funny that often, so I’m hoping a suggested practical joke will suffice…

Anyway, don’t just sit there. Head over to Troubled Diva and see what all the fuss is about.

bookmark_borderI is not racist

Deary me. Such a silly little TV programme causing such a stir. Let me just mount my “I haven’t been watching it this time” high horse, and we can get started.

Firstly I’ll state that I’m not interested in who said what, as my firm belief is that any kind of racist statement is a deplorable outcome of ill-education.

Secondly I’ll state that whilst I haven’t really been following this, it does seem to be very much a “reap what you sow” kind of situation, with the sickening implication that Channel 4 are probably, privately, pleased with the increased viewing figures and profile for the show.

Thirdly, it would seem that the main conflict isn’t race but intellect*.

After an exchange of words with Shetty, in which Shetty told Goody she needed elocution lessons, Goody launched into an expletive-ridden rant to Lloyd and O’Meara in which she said “fake” Shetty needed “a day in the slums”. [via]

The key issue, for me, is not how we correct this now, but how we MUST act to correct this for the future. And yes, as ever, it’ll be back to that old adage, education, education, education.
Continue reading “I is not racist”

bookmark_borderI wonder…

Does anyone come here expecting witty insights? Does anyone visit and cross their fingers that they will be dazzled by the lucidity and quality of my writing? Or do you lot just come here from habit?

Ach, I’m just glad you visit at all.

However, and this is in no way stealing an idea (perish the thought), I thought I’d try stimulating a little “community spirit”.

So, in the comments box, please suggest a title for tomorrow’s post. I will then select the title which appeals to me most, and will endeavour to construct some relevant words to match it.

One title per person only, please. Look, I know how over-excited some of you can get. So don’t go rushing into anything, OK?

The deadline for suggestions is Sunday at 17:00 (UK time).

HANDY HINT: To save any wasted effort on your part, here are some examples of what not to suggest.

  • “Are those curtains machine-washable?” – my most embarrassing sexual experience.
  • “Shit for brains!” – the 10 most useless prats that I have ever worked with.
  • “Automatics or gearboxes?” – a comparative study.
  • “Man of the match!” – my greatest sporting achievement.
  • “How did you get that texture into your dumplings?” – my most memorable culinary triumph.

Got the idea? OK, pitch!

Ohh yes, and I may use a few of your ideas. Artistic license and all that.

(ohh I’m sure mike won’t mind, will ya mike? mike? MIKE??)

bookmark_borderBloody Google

Things wot I have learnt in the past few days.

Man-size tissues should be mandatory. The piffly wee Kleenex ones, whilst they come in a nice box, are next to useless against the mucus factory in my head. One blow into a regular Kleenex tissue and I end up with … well I’m sure you can use your imaginations.

Checking the spelling of a word by googling it doesn’t always work. If your original guess at the spelling is way out, all you’ll get back are confirmations that yes, 147,583 people mis-spelled the word the same way you do. See Euchinasia for Echinacea, as an example.

Feed a cold, starve a fever they say. I’ll second that, as I’ve been ravenous. Unfortunately our house has recently been relocated to Dietland so that means I’m gorging myself on rice crackers, pretzels (the small dried UK kind), and … ohh… fruit. When what I really want is stodgy pies, doughnuts and a great big dripping QuarterPounder with Cheese… and yes I’d like to Supersize that. Completely futile anyway as I can’t taste a damn thing… ast night I had some chicken and potatoes and SALAD CREAM just so I could taste something!

Olbas oil may stink out the entire room but it does mean that I can breath through my nose for the first time in two days.

I STILL have man-flu.

*sniff*

More sympathy please. Ta.

bookmark_borderDumbing Down

I have no idea which part of my brain starts these thoughts but sometimes I wish it would stop. The following is the result of a lot of hypothetical reasoning and is probably completely tosh. But if I don’t write this down I’ll go mental.

Recently there has been a recurring thought rattling about in my head concerning the de-education and de-sensitisation of society that has lead us to our current state of low morals, low intelligence and lowest common pandering.. but I’m struggling to piece it all together.

I read an article the other day that bemoaned the manner in which the news is reported, claiming that it is deliberately sensationalist and dumbed down. On the whole I have to agree, but the TV stations have to maintain an audience so it’s not really their fault, is it?

Let’s start with the standard of TV in general. The rise of consumer based programmes can be linked to the record levels of debt in the UK, we are an increasingly materialistic society the reasons for which lie in a variety of areas including but not limited to globalisation and a general decline in religious beliefs — the former gives us cheaper and cheaper products, the latter is an excuse for selfishness? Hey, I didn’t say this was well thought out…

I think the fascination with celebrity can be thrown into the mix as well. And as our credit cards provide us with the extra money, and thus the desire to spend, we apparently seem to need people to emulate — What does [insert celeb] have in his/her living room?

So the next obvious question has to be why we feel the need to emulate these people, and how much of that emulation is actually a need for validation; If I own what that popular, well-known person owns, then I’ll get a little of that same popularity and recognition for myself, I’ll be just like them, love me too!!

Are we all really THAT lacking in self-confidence?

I’m guessing we are for I can think of no other reason why there is ANOTHER “design a new room (a new you?) in only 6 hours using sellotape and dead hamsters!” program ‘coming soon’.

Right, we are getting somewhere now, a lack of self confidence can be traced to… come on, you know… that’s right, lack of validation, reassurance and encouragement as a child. Simple. And who do we blame when that goes wrong, why the parents of course!

So there you go. Simple. Blame the parents.

But we can’t. It’s not their fault. For starters, they are only a product of their generation, many of whom lived through a war…

Hang on, is THAT what we are lacking?

Is the fundamental reason our society continues to exhibit less than wanted traits because we’ve not had a ‘hard time’ recently? Because, these days, the wars are in far off lands, relayed via satellite into our living rooms (and thus helping with the de-sensitisation).

Do we lack respect for authority because authority is, essentially, meaningless? Disobey a warden during war time may have meant wandering under a falling bomb, what punishment do we give today for ‘anti-social behaviour’? A few weeks community service? Do we have it too easy?

Of course there is no one answer, especially not given the huge amount of generalisation that I’ve thrown about, willy-nilly. Lack of education, respect, and obedience are all lining up as potential victims, but more importantly what is the solution? IS there a solution?

The evidence is there for all to see, and here is a final thought on the matter. As the usage of the internet grows, the number of TV channels increases and the long tail kicks in, will the divide between the ‘dumb’ and the ‘not so dumb’ increase? If we can all pick and choose our life experiences, our knowledge and our specialisation, then how will we be able to interact with one another in the future? If we are cocooned in our own mini-societies, what becomes of us?