bookmark_borderFour Deadly Words

“Make mine a Guinness” (x9)

Ma heid’s loupin the day. Fair blootert so I wiz. Hope I dinnae boak.

For the foreigners in our midst I suggest the Scottish Vernacular Dictionary may help decipher. And for those wanting to explore the uniqueness of the Glasgow parlance, may I recommend Wir Ain Leid – Glasgow Scots a fascinating, and very technical, article which should help with your pronunciation of some wonderful Glesga words.

The latter link also gives an insight into why (previously) call centres flourished in Scotland. All to do with proper and correct pronunciation darlings.

(Darlings? WTF? I’m turning into Peter!)

bookmark_borderWandering

Spot of shopping at lunch time. Spotted this URL on a fly-poster – you know, the ones bands and clubs use and get posted on boarded up windows and doors – www.flypost.it. Describes itself as ‘Guerilla Marketing’. And I thought fly-posting was illegal. Hmmm.

Also spotted was that Scottish designer bloke aff the telly. You know, the one with the blonde hair.. I think he’s gay… appears with another bloke (his partner?) on these makeover shows… ach you know who I mean. And no I can’t be bothered Googling for him.

And lastly a minor observation and subject of frequent discussion in the pub.

Why do women wear low cut tops then get pissed off when men glance* at their chests.

* Some men can glance ya know. It’s true. Personally I prefer a good ogle but hey… you probably guessed that already 😉

bookmark_borderNo variations please, I'm narked

Does anyone else do this? Is it just me? Read on…

Louise is on holiday today, tomorrow and Monday. I’ll be in work those days. That’s fine. No problem. My usual travel partner is also on holiday (it’s her birthday). No problem there either.

I’ll take the car to the station. I can use the iPod on the train* to drown out Little Miss Loudgob. I’ll get off the train at Argyll Street to add a 10 minute walk to my journey (trying to be healthy).

I’ll get into work. Have a coffee. Read my email. All will be well with my day.

That’s the plan. That WAS the plan. That WAS the plan until some tosser plonked himself down right next to me on the train, and managed to yank the earphones from my ears AND out of the iPod jack. That WAS the plan until my ‘morning walk’ turned into nothing more than a continual ‘avoidance of wankers’.

So I’m narked. MAJORLY.

Thing is I shouldn’t be. I did take the car to the station. I did use the iPod on the train. I did get off the train a stop early and walk to work. I have had a coffee (now two) and I AM reading my email.

But it wasn’t exactly as I planned. It didn’t pan out as I thought it would, wished it would, dreamed it would. That annoys me.

I get the same way at the weekend. I like to plan. I like to know what is coming, and I don’t like deviation from it, not one jot. My plans do not allow for variation. Variation is bad. Variation gets me narked.

Anyone else suffer from this?

* Instructions for setting ‘acceptable volume levels’.

1. Hold the headphones in your hand, NOT next to your ear.
2. Press play.
3. If you can hear the singer drawing breath between lines – IT’S TOO LOUD!
4. Set the volume so that you can barely hear the music.
5. Place headphones on head/in ears – depending on model of headphones.

Simple.

If anyone knows the woman who had her ‘walkman’ set so loud that I could hear it three rows away, WITH my iPod playing, please forward these instructions on to her. If she isn’t contactable by email please phone her but remember that you may need to shout as she’s no doubt in the final stages of progression to complete deafness.

bookmark_borderSo…. emmm… hi…

Still stuck for some reason, maybe there is too much going on.

Work is getting hectic and veering from the normal everyday work to discussions of a bigger nature about processes and business analysis and … etc etc. But then it’s always been like that, well it has for me anyway, and to be honest I’m quite glad that it’s headed back to that state – shows that things are picking up. Ohh I forgot. “I don’t blog about work”. Moving on then…

I want to write about abortion, prompted by Green Fairy. I want to write about smoking bans in Scotland, prompted by Peter. I want to write more about the redesign (and continue it), prompted by Scrivs at White Space.

But I won’t. Can’t. What? Ohhh go on then. I’ll keep it brief.

Abortion – I believe in the woman’s right to choose.
Smoking – I believe a ban is a good thing. I like air.
Redesign – I WILL implement a style sheet switcher and allow both bigger fonts and a more minimal site design.

There. I did it. Composed a blog post from nothing. Ain’t I clever.

I’m off to bugger about with Scottish Blogs – if you hear a muffled scream that involves PHP code don’t worry, it’s just me.

bookmark_borderCurrently

Blocked. Stuck. Absent. Frozen. Closed. Rooted. Suspended. Grounded. Stumped. Hindered. Impeded. Obstructed. Hindered. Stopped. Inert. Stagnant. Dormant. Static. Torpid. Stalled.

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