Bite me

Pop culture. Words used. Origin unknown. Meanings conferred. Brewed in the brain. Subtleties lost. Twisted timelines. Asian whispers. Playground offices. Stolen. Misused. Appropriated. Triggered disconnects. Global memes. Memories merging. Pasts colliding. A nip of this. Media unknown. Mix well. Pilfered accents. References mashed. A dash of that. Decades apart. Lifetimes passed. Fashion disregarded. Delivered without pause. “Bite me” has returned to my lexicon. Reasons escape me.

Continue reading »

Weekend Reading

Do Not Pass Go: Interview With The Monopoly Thimble Perhaps nobody cares about their clothes anymore. Sad times for a thimble, cast aside. The Coffee Shaman “The way a shaman comes to light is that, as a child, he’s given fairy tales that are only that: fairy tales. And the shaman has to then penetrate the veil, to understand that there’s really something else beyond.” Now, I love coffee but… shaman? 4chan: The Skeleton Key to the Rise of Trump Trump’s younger supporters know he’s an incompetent joke; in fact, that’s why they support him. Around 2005 or so a strange link started showing up in my old webcomic’s referral logs. This new site I didn’t understand. It was a …

Continue reading »

Mission to Mars

My dearest loved ones, I’m writing to all of you in the hope that my words will bring some solace and help you adjust to what is about to happen. You all know how excited I was when they announced this project, you’ve all supported me and encouraged me to work hard to make it happen, and you’ve all been there through my darkest days when I thought it was slipping out of my reach. From the moment I heard about the mission to Mars I knew I had to be on the crew, all those years staring up at the sky, wondering what lay beyond, the holidays to the Moon bases, and my acceptance to Lunar College were all …

Continue reading »

Decluttering Tyler

I am not my job. I am not how much money I have in the bank. I am not the car I drive. I am not the contents of my wallet. I am not my fucking khakis. I am not the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world. (paraphrased from a movie we don’t talk about) Three boxes of books and five bags of clothes given to charity, four bags of  assorted rubbish taken to the dump, one bookcase, one box of assorted drinking glasses, and a few lamps gone, and soon to be added to the list of outgoing items are two chests of drawers and a chair bed (sale pending). It’s embarrassing. Not just the volume but how easily …

Continue reading »

Weekend Reading

Did a violin teacher from Plano, Texas solve the world’s greatest classical music mystery? In 2006, Padgett was part of an orchestra preparing for a concert dedicated to the “mysteries and hidden messages” of Edward Elgar’s Variations on an Original Theme, Enigma, Op. 36. The Enigma Variations, as it is commonly called, is one of Britain’s most beloved classical music works. I love stuff like this, yeah, I’m a geek, bite me! I Work from Home ROBERT: Hi, I . . . uh . . . I work from home. OPERATOR: O.K., is anyone else there with you, sir? No longer an option but I can see how this could happen… Renewables are no longer ‘alternative.’ Fossil fuels are ‘legacy.’ …

Continue reading »

Review: Blogging the Rubicon

Caesar (yes, that one) instigated a war by crossing the river Rubicon, so when I heard that a new venture had opened, and taken its name from this historic act of war, my interest was piqued. Let’s see what Crossing the Rubicon had to offer. They had invited around 40 bloggers, of various shades of disrepute, and as with most new venues we were all keen to try the wares and see just how provoking the menu and approach was. The short answer, never judge a bar by its name (as you wouldn’t a book by its cover), but do judge it by the quality of its food (and beverages). The very short answer, good food and beer are served …

Continue reading »

When you don’t fit

Banged my head again. I wouldn’t mind so much but it was on the exact same spot on my head that I did it last time, and the time before that. I’m currently taping a wadded up towel round the sharp wooden edge of the entrance so I don’t do it again. Stupid walk-in cupboard. I should really just empty it out, not that there is much in it but it’s handy, or at least it would be if the entrance was a little bigger. It’s not that I’m not used to ducking to go through doors, I mean it’s an everyday habit for me. I remember one time visiting a museum, and old building that was no doubt built …

Continue reading »

Weekend Reading

Simply 69 funny jokes by 69 funny comedians Just 69 brilliant jokes as written by 69 brilliant comedians. What else is there to say, take it away Spike… 1. Spike Milligan “I thought I’d begin by reading a poem by Shakespeare, but then I thought, why should I? He never reads any of mine. 2. My kinda humour. Simple & clever. Like me! This New Dating App Will Find You Someone Who Dislikes All the Same Things Positivity is often advised whenever you start dating someone new: Along with hiding that you still Instagram-stalk your ex’s ex and consider a box of Wheat Thins to be a suitable dinner, you’re also not supposed to constantly bring up things that you …

Continue reading »

Beneath our feet

Do you ever get one of those weird compulsions to do something that you would never do? Like wanting to jump in a river fully clothed, or eating an entire raw onion? It’s kinda hard to explain and most of the time I just ignore them but the other day one of them struck me on my walk home from work. It was a gorgeous day so I left work a little early, thinking to meander my way homeward and enjoy the evening sunshine. Early  spring had delivered the first buds of green and I was quite content, plodding along with no desire to hurry, lost in daydreams and the casual nosiness of the urban wanderer. I took lanes and …

Continue reading »

January In Review

The first in a monthly series, largely for my own benefit, of my own highlights from the past month. Lived Highlights My niece turned one and remains the most adorable, inquisitive little thing. Had two ‘Christmas’ nights out with friends (much laughter, good food and boozes) Finally got down to Kelvingrove to see the wonderful Alphonse Mucha exhibition. Started attending guided Meditation, once a week so far, but enjoying it. Also The lease on my current (rented) flat is due up and I’ve decided to move. Cue a massive clear out in preparation (I have entirely too much stuff). And yes, I am reading Marie Kondo’s book. Stepcount: 279,203. Read Highlight – The GraceKeepers by Kirsty Logan The first book …

Continue reading »