bookmark_borderA day at the Fringe

Last Saturday we headed to Edinburgh for some Fringe frolics, with only a vague plan but no real expectations of what we might see, so as we walked towards the Gilded Balloon we accepted a few flyers and made some quick decisions!

First up was a musical comedian from Boston, Katie Goodman. She got things off to a great start with some lovely little songs and raps. Funny, crude and provocative, she certainly doesn’t mince her words; She thinks that some men are probably Gay, there are some things she doesn’t remember, she didn’t fuck it up and is a big advocate of Unfuck It Up.

Next up, and the highlight of the day for me, the Wellington International Ukelele Orchestra. Cover versions, sing alongs, laughter, glow sticks, inflatable palm trees, DIY spotlights and mirrorballs not to mention some brilliant performances and delicious harmonies! It was an hour of joyous music and fun, I only wish it had lasted longer! (they do a nice line in tea towels as well). I am a ukelele convert!

Finally, we head down to the Pleasance and after some sustenance decide to pick whatever was next. And so it came to be that we found ourselves in the audience for Pete Firman, a magician with a nice line in cocky comedy, and some clever magic. He delivered some laughs, a some good tricks and it nicely ended the, somewhat random, day on a good note.

We struck it lucky for sure, three random shows that were all great, but of the three it would have to be the WIUO was definitely the pick of the bunch.

bookmark_borderAssumptions

Written in response to the monthly theme on Poly Means Many: Assumptions

I am not ‘one of the lads’, I can play the role when needed but recently I’ve been less inclined to do so. It’s taken me a while to figure out why but I think it’s because I’m getting fed up with the assumptions made about me and my life choices.

I have two girlfriends. I talk of going on dates. Most of my peers (professionally at least) are married with children. I’m the same age as them but living the, perceived, life of a 20-something, out most weekends, partying and indulging in what they presume to be “debauchery” (they probably think I’m a swinger).

As I’ve started to understand the assumption is that, because I believe in polyamory, I’m now ‘the man’ living the life they think they want. If I’m being honest, a few years ago it’s likely I would’ve had a similar view; A rather average looking guy that has two gorgeous ladies as girlfriends? Wow, there must be something special about him!

But I am not special. At most I am considerate and kind to those I care about but beyond that I try and be decent, honest and fair. I don’t boast or brag about my lifestyle, but equally I’ve become less concerned with hiding it. That, of course, prompts questions which is inevitable I guess as the polyamorous lifestyle isn’t one that many people are familiar with.

So I answer the questions as best I can, but then the ‘nudge nudge wink wink’ begins, the presumptions about what my life must be like, and I shudder. I realise that it’s not really about me explaining my lifestyle as much as it is that I seem to be challenging their world view.

And if that is the case, so be it. I’m happy, and whilst I don’t expect everyone to agree with my life choices, I am starting to understand that I want to challenge their assumptions as best I can. Not just for me, but for the people in my life I care about.