Another year approaches

Can’t quite believe that 2013 is almost over. Looking back it’s been a fairly eventful year, but then, it’s every one? At work I changed roles to do a job I hadn’t done before. It’s been stressful, exciting, and bloody hard work but I’m still glad I took the opportunity. There was some more travel to Sunnyvale but much less than I anticipated. I also managed to get my running back on track enough to do a 5K, alas things fell away again so I’m looking for a new goal to get me back on track. Holiday wise I didn’t get away anywhere other than to Glastonbury. It was fantastic, a second year for Kirsty and I, and we were much …

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What Poly Looks Like

I’ve mentioned this before, but despite how many people think a set of polyamorous relationships work, the reality is that it takes a lot of work, communication and calendaring to get to the good bits of having multiple, loving partners to spend time with. We’ve just about got the next two weeks sorted it and it struck me that this is a perfect sign of trying to balance the desires and plans of four people around the festive period, particularly given that we all also have added pressures/desires to be with families. This is what next week looks like (and it doesn’t include everything!). Thank the baby jebus for shared Google Calendars!

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Friends and Family

I’m very lucky. I have a small but loyal group of friends and a small but loving family. I’m guilty at times of taking these easily, if not for granted, nor making the time to see them when I should. This time of year highlights these facts of course, and I take some solace that I’ve seen a little more of my friends this year than I’ve managed previously. As for my family, well I sometimes fear that I’m becoming something of the ‘absent son’. My parents are very independent but each time I visit, about once a month these days, I notice more and more how things are changing. And don’t ask me the last time I saw my …

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Winding down

The past couple of weeks have been somewhat hectic. It’s part and parcel of my job and these times aren’t the norm but they do happen and no matter how far in advance I know of them they always hit me pretty hard. My stress levels and working hours rise, sleep decreases and I end up in a mostly grumpy/stressed mood. I try to keep a lid on all that when I’m dealing with my loved ones of course, which takes some effort which adds to the tiredness and… so on and so forth. It’s a short brutal cycle that veers from grumpiness to out and out anger, quickly followed by a ‘how do I sort this’ bluntness which can …

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I’m dreaming of…

Poly Means Many: There are many aspects of polyamory. Each month, the PMM bloggers will write about their views on one of them. Links to all posts can be found at polymeansmany.com. A Poly Christmas (ho ho ho!) The festive season is upon us once more! Yuletide approaches, mince pies are being warmed, trees decorated and everywhere across the land talk turns to Christmas Day and the bounties that await on the dinner table. Families rejoice and gleefully wear lurid jumpers, novelty socks and all quietly enjoy the Queen’s speech. Or so the TV adverts would have you believe. Ohhh yes, and we all drink Coke. Putting my cynicism aside, it is true that for many, whether you celebrate it or …

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Writing about writing on writing

I’m always one for the latest thing, particularly when it comes to social media. So when I heard the @Ev (the man behind Blogger and Twitter) had started up something new, I was quick to check it out. His latest venture is called Medium. It’s an online writing space. At least that’s part of what it is. It’s a wonderful hybrid; an excellent online writing tool (which already makes writing this blog post in WordPress seem clunky), and a shared repository of posts and articles created using Medium. It’s a lovely tool to use and speaks to the fact that, for many people, the act of writing needs a focus and space to be allowed to flourish. There are many …

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Focus, focus, focus

File this under ‘so obvious it hurts’. I recently signed up for Yelp, prompted by both the rise of people in my Twitter timeline using it and the number of local businesses on Twitter starting to smartly engage with customers. I’ve been following some of these businesses and it’s great that they ‘get’ how the interactions work, bringing a real sense of the people behind the business, as well as insights into how they are working, where they get their produce from and so on. Top tip: If you have a recognisable profile photo on Twitter, you may find you walk into a restaurant and one of the owners walks up to introduce himself because he recognises you. Since then I’ve …

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My Overcommitment Cycle

I’ve written about this type of thing before but I recently read the phrase “overcommitment cycle” the other day and it reminded me of a realisation I had about such cycles. Turns out, and I know this will not be a shock to anyone, I am very much a product of my parents upbringing and environment. I know, what a revelation! My Mum and Dad have many similiarities, one of which I have inherited/learned is the drive to be involved and contributing to things, be it projects, clubs, events and such like. I have mostly definitely inherited their ‘get things done’ mindset and added in my own level of focus and drive. What I realised the other day was that …

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Why I blog

I’ve always enjoyed words, reading and writing. At school English was my favourite subject, with Physics a close second (if there had been a computing O Grade I would probably have taken that instead). My parents are both teachers and much of my inquisitive nature was fuelled by books; I still have, and treasure, a set of Readers Digest encyclopedias gifted to me by my late grandparents. My Dad was always interested in computers, so from the days of having a BBC Micro, and then an Apple Macintosh Plus in the house it’s no surprise that I got interested in those too. Put computers and words together and writing seems to be the obvious next step. From the initial wonder …

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Remember yourself

Poly Means Many: There are many aspects of polyamory. Each month, the PMM bloggers will write about their views on one of them. Links to all posts can be found at polymeansmany.com Let me start with a simple premise: Relationships are a compromise, and those compromises are made to find balance to make sure everyone is as happy as they can be. Compromises are made on all sides and over time they even out. Of course, in poly relationships there is more than one person to consider when it comes to compromise and that can mean there is a risk that you, with the best intentions, start over-compromising in favour of your partners. Whilst this may be driven by the …

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