bookmark_borderThe Goblet of Fire

Movie info from IMDB
Movie reviews from Metacritic

Finally got some free time today and nipped to the cinema to catch the latest Harry Potter movie. Bloody glad we did too!

From the opening credits to the closing scenes this is a dark movie, much darker than the previous movie and all the better for it. The movie centres around a wizard tournament into which Harry finds himself mysteriously involved. Dangerous challenges abound and for the first time in this series of movies I found myself not noticing the CGI scenes as much as I did in the past.

The tone of the movie allowed the pace to high, moving from action sequence to action sequence with a little character development along the way. More back story, more side stories and the series becomes deeper and richer and now feels a lot more mature and well crafted than the first two movies did (the third was a marked improvement).

The teenage actors are still a bit wooden, but the supporting cast grows stronger and stronger and keeps things at a consistent level. And of course the appearance of the villain of the piece, finally, puts the marker down for the next three movies in the series. I sincerely hope they can keep the cast together for, if they were to change them now, it would lose a lot of the consistency they’ve managed to achieve already. You truly feel that you are a Muggle in the world of magic.

No comparisons with the book are required, I don’t think. The movies stand on their own as unique versions of a story, in the same way the Disney’s Cinderella is more fondly remembered than the story from which it came.

The Goblet of Fire is an altogether different movie from previous as it marks the turning point in the series, the overall feeling of foreboding and evil (well, nastiness at least) was well handled and didn’t venture into pantomime territory. Thoroughly enjoyable, and I’m pretty sure this one will stand up to some repeat viewings, there are better movies out at the moment but this one is worth a look.

bookmark_borderHo Ho Ho

Why is it that, when you are completely physically exhausted, your brain refuses to shut down and let you go to sleep? Is it just me?

A day spent up and down ladders, moving large heavy boxes. A day of construction, organising, tidying, moving, considering, discussing, trying, replacing, tweaking, finishing off. A day spent wondering where the hell we put it all last year, and how it seems to expand every time we bring it all down from the loft.

Yes, we are now living in Santa’s grotto.

Admittedly, this year, I’m happier than usual that the tree and assorted decorations are going up. If nothing else because Louise loves this time of year so much, and it was nice to see her with that child-like smile on her face as we opened box after box of ornaments and sparkling things. Her glee at ‘discovering’ a forgotten item kept me going through the day, until we both collapsed on the sofa wondering why it takes so long to decorate our little house.

This morning the empty boxes have been returned to the loft and some sanity has been restored to the house – it was getting to be a bit too much of an obstacle course for my liking. Just making a cup of coffee required you to negotiate the “wall of tinsel”, slalom round the intricate course of “fallen baubles”, before the last, death-defying, tightrope walk along the fairy lights.

Now all we need is some snow.

bookmark_borderThe Great Blog Hope?

An open letter to SixApart.

Dear TypeKey,

You came promising much, the chance to be able to track myself across the comment boxes of the land, the opportunity to build relations and create networks. A unique insight to my self, my habits and passions. Ohh how you have failed me.

Maybe I expected too much, maybe I didn’t really ‘get’ what you are all about, and if that is the case then accept my apologies and my excuses for my apathy. Mind you, you can’t even be bothered to remember me for longer than two weeks so it’s not like you are trying so hard yourself.

Do you treat others this way? Or have you stopped caring altogether? I once thought of you as a saviour, a guiding light, constant and unwavering, through the maze of commenting systems and blogging platforms. Little did I realise you were just an optical illusion, a dazzling artefact that flattered to deceive.

Don’t worry I’ll keep in touch, I’m not abandoning you, I still care. I just wanted to write to make sure you realised my disappointment.

Yours in apathy,

Gordon McLean

For those who are currently wondering what the chuff I’m waffling on about (and let’s be honest, it’s not the first time):

“TypeKey is a free, open system providing you a central identity for posting comments on weblogs and logging into other websites.”

So, to my mind, what this service could (should) do is, for every website I visit that is TypeKey enabled, allow me to generate a list of all the comments I’ve ever made. Alas that doesn’t seem to be the reasoning.

But why not? It’s the one thing ‘missing’ in most blogging stats, and the hardest one to crack, yet there is an API available so why hasn’t anyone risen to this challenge? Are there pitfalls I can’t see? Why isn’t there a tool to do this? There are a plethora of online tools, with more and more focus on blogs then surely this is a ‘must-have’ item??

I’m confused, let-down and wondering if I should take up the baton myself. Except I’m kinda busy at the moment…

Ohhh and apologies for the title, it’s supposed to be a take on the Great White Hope but not sure it works too well.

bookmark_borderSnippets

Mike proves that the easiest way to get comments for your post is to change the design. Why do we find change so hard to take?

~

My downward trend has continued. Whilst only a measly 1lb lighter than last week, I’m quite happy. Especially given that last night I had a big stir fry at my brother-in-laws, and on Wednesday night we visited an “all you can eat” Chinese buffet place before we went to see Lee Evans. Add in a distinct lack of exercise due to time constraints (ok ok due to me being too lazy…) and 1lb is quite an achievement!

~

We popped in to see my parents last night and Mum gave me back some of my old piano books. Full of threats and notes from my piano teacher, it might be just the thing to get me to use the little Yamaha keyboard to play music on instead of a permanent home to various pieces of paperwork.

~

I CBATG so can anyone tell me how Michael Jackson came to own the rights to the Beatles back catalogue?

bookmark_borderThe Monkey Man

It’s the middle of nowhere and in a seemingly deserted shack a man is tied to a chair. He is convulsing and struggling to breathe, bent double as the pain spreads across his chest and down his sides. In closeup we see the muscles in his face strain and pulse, the dull throb evident after the first 20 minutes but there is no let up, the pace doesn’t slow, no remorse is shown.

The camera pans slowly round the writhing body until a glow, soon to be identified as a television set, enters the frame. Passing round the bobbing head of the man, tears are streaming down his face, his eyes locked on to the images on the screen in front of him. The camera pauses and changes focus, the television screen leaps into clarity and on it a man, in a dark suit, is parading around a stage. He is drenched in sweat, mopping his face and head with a white towel, and frequently emits an embarassed giggle… .

Lee Evans is an evil man. On three separate occasions last night he tried to stop me from performing the most basic function that a body requires, and I had to force myself to sit upright and BREATHE…. ahhhhh….

Relentless, hysterical, hyperactive, engaging, self-effacing, inventive, hilarious and many other words can’t really sum up the Lee Evans live show. From the Baz Luhrmann-esque introduction video, to the closing reprise of his mimed version of Bohemian Rhapsody (the first time thing I ever saw him perform), his energy, enthusiasm and the sheer velocity of jokes saw this two and half hour set zoom by in a blur of guffaws, belly laughs and “please stop for a minute, I CAN’T BREATHE!!” hysterics.

As ever the difference between me telling a joke and a comedian telling a joke is the delivery, and whilst I am going to mention a couple of his observations I’m not listing them here to make you laugh but so I can remember them at a later date.

On his dog:

You know that way dogs scratch their bum across the carpet? Well we had a nylon carpet and by the time he got to the other side of the room he looked like Don King!

On global warming:

Everywhere I go in my house there are pebbles, people are worried that the coastline is disappearing. No it’s not! It’s in my fucking living room! And of course there are all those candles. That’s the real reason the world is getting warmer, all those fucking candles!!

On travel:

And what gate do you get? ‘Gate 54 Sir’. Ohh it’s never Gate 1 is it! Have you EVER been to Gate 1!!! What are they trying to do, save FUCKIN PETROL!

The trick is that they weigh the luggage but they don’t weigh us! Put on ALL your holiday clothes and waddle up to the checkin desk, that’ll teach ’em! ‘Are you checking in any luggage Sir?’ No, I’m wearing it all!

On technology:

His palmpilot does “actual” handwriting recognition so you can “actually” write on it, in your own “actual” writing and it “actually” recognises it! Hold on mate, I’ll just get an “actual” pen and “actually” write this down on an “actual” PIECE OF PAPER!!

Monks were the first photocopiers you know, they’d sit in rooms making copies of the bible. Can you imagine the repairman coming out to fix a broken Monk? “Ohh sorry love, I don’t do Brothers, only Canons…”

And so on and on and on… if you’ve seen Lee Evans perform you’ll can imagine the voices, the indignation, the timing, the shouting, the physical comedy involved with the above.

Anyway, I can safely say that I have NEVER laughed so hard for so long. My face still aches this morning, as do my sides and I keep getting little flashbacks and giggling like an idiot. That got me a few strange looks on the train this morning.

Ohh and a brief word to all those people SOOOOO desperate to leave early. Yes I know he marks the end of his sets with a song, and yes it wasn’t a comedy song (but that’s part of his charm, the bittersweet sendup), but if you’d just waited a little longer you’d have gotten the bonus treat at the end. I’m pretty sure it was staged, even if he did make it seem impromptu – claiming that a bloke he’d bumped into in the street yesterday had said he’d better ” ‘fuckin’ do it, or I’ll kill ye’ and… well… this is Glasgow so I figured he might actually do it!” – it was still an excellent EXCELLENT ending to a wonderful night of entertainment.

Eddie Izzard was “clever funny”, well written, well delivered and made me laugh out loud a lot. Lee Evans is well written (including those ’embarassed giggles’ which he very cleverly uses to sustain the laughter… definitely a stage trick that one) and interweaves a lot of the gags together as well but the key difference is the energy. Lee Evans is a tornado onstage, and his enthusiasm pours out and drags you into his surreal little world.

In closing then, for I’m beginning to waffle, I’ll pick out one line from his show. He delivered it in the midst of a stream of jokes, pausing to look over the audience with a gentle smile on his face. It was said softly, genuinely and with the emotion of a man who loves what he does. Straight after it he launched back into the next joke, almost as if he hadn’t said it, but he did and it summed up the night for me perfectly.

Listen to that laughter, what a great sound

Indeed it is, Mr Evans. Thank you for providing it.

bookmark_borderSweaty Little Man

“I started doing physical comedy, because I was like a moving target. You know what British audiences are like – ‘he’s shit, kill him!’ My upbringing taught me to keep moving”

Lee Evans tonight. Can’t wait. Expecting sore sides tomorrow.